Me and Hubby: "Okay, guys. When you go up to the house, you ring the door bell--ONCE--and when they answer, you say, 'Trick or treat.' After they give you candy, be sure to say thank you and come back to us."
The Boys: "Okay."
They approach the house with caution, my youngest constantly tripping over the candy bag that is as tall as he is. Then comes the assualt on the doorbell. They attack it with such vigor I swear you could have heard it from a mile away. So much for ringing the bell ONCE.
Nice old lady answers. Then my ever-so-tactful three year old barges into the house and says, "So, what kinda candy YOU got?"
[Run, Michele. Run.]
Nice old lady isn't shaken. "Oh, well, let's see, I've got these purple LifeSavers..."
"Yeah, well that's not my favorite color, though. How about green?"
[I'm clearly going to hell for being such an inept mother.]
Nice old lady is wondering who this kid is, but manages to find some green candy. Once the candy is safely stashed in their bags, my kids suddenly remember their manners and thus begins the barage of "Happy Haooooooweeeeeen!" and "Bye, see ya!" and "Trick or Treat!" (?????) and "Thank you!!!!!" and my personal favorite:
"Bye, bye. Love you."
[Maybe I'm going to heaven after all.]